WHAT I REMEMBER ABOUT CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER UK SEASON 12

By Niina Pollari

 

 

In it Courtney Stodden spends a lot of time in skimpy outfits
Around some fading English people
And other youthful but more plain English people
It is clear to everyone that Courtney is the American among them
The kind of American that people from other places imagine
A flashy mirage of bones and butt
Tackily resourceful
And so, so sweet

There was another girl, Charlotte
Who was the winner at the end of the season

One night Courtney is drunk and others are too
At first Courtney dances provocatively in a cage
And then tries to convince Charlotte to pee into her shoe
It is one of those stripper shoes that holds water in the bottom

Someone stops Charlotte
From peeing into the big shoe

So in an incredibly generous gesture
Or to keep the party going well for everybody
Courtney pours her drink into the shoe instead.


Niina Pollari is the author of DEAD HORSE (Birds, LLC 2015) and the translator of Tytti Heikkinen's The Warmth of the Taxidermied Animal (Action Books 2012).